Two 2 year olds

 The boys are now over 2 years old and I have had thoughts haunting me lately about how I am going to forget everything about this stage that I have a love-hate relationship with. In a lot of ways I really just want to freeze them at this stage forever. Since I don't have any control over this I thought I should at least document it so that I can remember it myself.

Tenny

- Has been slow in talking, but the words I hear the most are "Stop it Chap." He is really good at any words that start with an "S" like "Show" or "Shoe" or "Sock."

- He is obsessed with screens. If you leave a phone, ipad, or laptop out and it is quiet you know that you will most likely find Tenny in a room handing out with it. He has figured out how to take pictures on devices without having to unlock them. If the device is unlocked already he is getting really good at swiping and can navigate his way into shows on Disney plus. A screen can entertain him for hours and he will watch entire movies on the TV without moving.

- He's usually the first one I hear yelling in the morning and after naps. He lets us all know when they are ready to get up. Most of the time we also hear jumping in their cribs with the yelling.

- When you say "Pew, you stink" he will hold his nose with his fingers.

- His huge smile, blue eyes, and blonde hair make him a little hard to resist, even when he is being naughty.

- He loves books and can usually sit through a few at a time. His favorite book is the Disney "cars" book with all of the different cars in it. He will look at that book for a long time.

- He is a pretty picky eater and really looks at the cues of others to decide if he likes something. However, he never turns down dessert. Ice cream and cookies are his favorite. He doesn't know very many baby signs, but he does know the "cookie" sign.

- He loves shoes, especially high heels that make noises on the wood floor. He often tap dances on the hard wood floor.

- If Chap is screaming, it usually because Tenny took something from him and then took off. Tenny does a great job of being sneaky but Chap gives it away.

- He loves having his back scratched. When he is having a freak out sometimes the only way I can get him to calm down is to give him his binky and blanket and have him sit on my lap with his back scratched. He just starts melting and can't sustain the screams.

- He loves anything with wheels. Trains, cars, bikes. I've found him trying to climb on the big kid bikes to ride them. He is also obsessed with driving the car. We have let him play in the car a few times and now every time we get in the car he freaks out when I put him in the car seat because he wants to drive the car instead. He always makes sure he buckles up before he starts driving. The night before we were supposed to leave on our family vacation to Florida he was playing in the van and turned the lights on. Needless to say, we had to jumpstart the battery the next day before leaving.

- He figured out how to climb out of the pack and play while we were on vacation in Florida but hasn't figured out the crib yet. His legs are a little too short and he isn't brave enough to make it that far down. While we were on vacation one night we had just put the boys to bed and come downstairs. Next thing we know we see Tenny sitting at the top of the stairs.

- He calls anyone "mom" that is taking care of him. I don't think I've ever heard him say "dad".

- He loves to draw and can hold a pencil the correct way already. The marks that he makes on the page are very intentional. We have to be careful about leaving notebooks or scriptures out though because he has been known to scribble throughout them. He also drew all over the kitchen bench one day. Luckily it was washable marker.

Chap

- He loves to strip off clothes. There were a few months (Nov-Dec 2020) that I couldn't keep his clothes on when he was sleeping. I started pinning his zipper pajamas and that fixed the nighttime but he was still stripping for naps every day. It was like every time I put him the crib it was a cue to start taking his clothes off. Tenny would just laugh and watch. I would come in with them giggling and Chap would be butt naked with his bedding all wet from his pee. Even dressing him in a onesie didn't help because he figured out how to climb out of it through the neck, or to pull his diaper off without even unbuttoning the onesie. The thing that broke it for good (hopefully) was going on vacation in Florida for a week. He didn't strip at all while we were there and hasn't since (cross your fingers). 

- One day I found  him stripped in his crib with poop all over his bed and on his hands. Let's hope he never does that again. It was not a fun cleanup. 

- He loves balls. In fact, I would say that was probably one of his first words besides mom. He has a pretty good throw too and will do it over and over again. 

- He has quite the high-pitched scream, but most of the time it is induced by Tenny stealing something. I don't think he is a screamer by nature.

- He is a really good eater once he tries something he generally likes it. He is super messy though. I am hopeful that we are through the food throwing stage. He was awful. I was mopping the floor every day because of him and I found food on the walls, curtains, and furniture. Since moving them to the table we have had less food throwing. If you are eating something he will sneak up next to you on the bench and back up into your lap. Then he will start smacking his lips. This means he is ready to try some of your food. If he has a bite, he will usually eat everything on your plate.

- He loves to put on socks and shoes. He is actually pretty proficient at putting on his own socks. I have found him with other family members unmatched socks that he found floating around the house on his feet.

- I've never had a kid that was so distructo. He tears up books, throws things, and opens containers that he isn't supposed to. He can unscrew just about any lid and loves to figure out how things work by taking them on and off. He doesn't do it mischieviously. I think he just gets bored and likes to explore. I'm pretty sure he was the one who got the laundry soap lid off and the cocoa powder. Although I would need a security camera to confirm.

- He is a super happy kid. He is very ticklish and has a contagious laugh. He doesn't like having his back scratched like Tenny because he is too ticklish and just giggles the whole time.

Four months

The boys checked out great today. They are starting to make a broader gap in their weights. Their builds are so different from each other. It will be interesting to see how they grow side by side.

They are both giggling like crazy this month. They love to play peek a boo and being tickled. They like to be a part of the action and not in another room if there is something going on. They still both sleep really great (although the last week they have been getting up at 4:00am hungry; I think they are going through a growth spurt). They feed 6 times a day for 10-15 minutes. I think they are getting about 4-5 ounces a feeding as that is what they eat when we give them a bottle. They take bottles every week at church so I don't have to nurse them. We also top them off with a few ounces of breastmilk pumped in the morning before they go to bed at night.

They both still like to be swaddled but are become escape artists and wiggle their arms out. They go to sleep on their own great. All we do is swaddle them up and stick the binky in. We've had a few people come help babysit while I went to appointments and shopping and they can't believe how easy they are.

Here are the stats from their appointment:

Chapman:
length: 23" (5%)
Weight: 11lbs 10 oz (5%)
Head: 16.5" (38%)

Super cuddly little guy. The young women in our ward fight over who will hold Chap because he is so much easier to hold being smaller and cuddly. He hates his tummy and loves the bumbo. One side of the back of his head is getting a little bit flat, so we are trying to position him on the other side while he sleeps.

Tennyson:
length: 24" (16%)
Weight: 13lbs 3 oz (13%)
Head: 16.25" (23%)

Still a super stiff baby. We call him "the brick" because that's what it feels like when you hold him. He loves to stand on his feet and gets really excited. He likes being on his tummy but does not like sitting in the bumbo. I think he doesn't like being folded in half for too long. Still battling craddle cap but hopefully it will go away soon with the vaginal cream we are putting on it :)

Three months

Personality. This month I am starting to see the individual personality of these boys coming out. We made a trip to Arizona and they were both troopers. They rode so well in the car and only cried when they needed to eat. They didn't have an appointment this month so I'm not sure where they are sitting on their weight, but I know that Tennyson is definitely heavier than Chapman. They also feel very different when you hold them as Chap cuddles into you and Tenny arches his back and tries to get away.

They are sleeping great at night. I feed them at 10pm and then they don't get up to eat again until 5:00am. I usually feed them and then put them back down and wake them up after the kids are off to school at 8:00am. It also allows me to get a run in before feeding them again. Still tandem feeding. One of my favorite things is seeing them hold hands as I feed them. I imagine they really like having a companion with them all of the time.

They were split up for an hour for the first time ever. I went to a Relief Society activity and left Chapman at home and took Tennyson with me. Felt a little bit weird to only have one baby with me.

This month we are getting lots of smiles and giggles. The siblings are going crazy over them lately and all fight over who will hold them. They fit into 3 month clothes pretty solidly but also some 0-3 month stuff still too.

We sure love these boys.

2 months

Lots of growing going on around here. We are starting to figure out their personalities this month.

They both still fit into newborn clothes and feel like they weigh pretty much the same. 

They rarely cry at the same time, but when they do it is like "baby surround sound."

They are really good at the blank stares. 

The first smiles popped out this month. Monica caught Chap while babysitting at her house (Lincoln wanted to get a little sniff)

When Tenny smiles it shows how chubby he really is.

They are awesome car riders and can't resist falling asleep.

They are great sleepers and have slept through the night a handful of times. They usually wake up around 3:00am but I think they are ready to start stretching it a little bit longer.

Tenny loves tummy time and Chap doesn't last very long as he is not a fan. 

Hard Joy

The twins are now over a month. Time is flying and I'm worried that in 5 years I won't be able to remember what my life was like when I first had these little boys. I had a friend with twins tell me that the first year of her twin's life is a complete blur because they were in survival mode. She said at least she had the pictures to prove that it actually happened. I decided I wanted more than just pictures, but also a memory of what I learned in the first month of having twins and how it is shaping me as a mother and a person.

In no particular order, here are the top 10 things I have learned this month with twins...

10. You will eat your own words. 

The things that I said I would never buy because they were a waste of money, I realized I needed when I had two babies. That ginormous nursing pillow called "my brest friend" really has become my best friend. It is absolutely necessary to tandem feed twins. The other lifesaver has been the double bottle warmer. These boys take bottles great (hallelujah!) and the bottle warmer heats up breastmilk to perfection so much faster and easier than running it under hot water.

9. You can never have enough of anything.

My friends threw me a diaper shower before the boys were born and I had a closet full of diapers sitting there waiting to be used. I thought I had plenty of newborn diapers to get me through the first month. Turns out I should have planned on at least triple what I had. I mean I knew I would go through a lot of diapers but...wow...just wow. That pretty much goes for everything too...burp cloths, onesies, binki's...you name it!

One night of diapers. For reals.

8. Recovery from a C-section is...different.

I had my other 5 kids vaginally. These boys had to be a C-section because Chap was breech and Tenny was transverse. After I had my other babies I was up and taking a shower as soon as my epidural wore off. I felt great! It was weird to have to "take it easy" and not do anything for a while this time around. I realized if I did too much I usually regretted it with a sore incision. I learned my lesson a few days during the first month when I overdid it, like helping to undecorate the Christmas tree. I am now back to running and feeling somewhat normal, but it took three times as long as my other deliveries. I learned to be patient and listen to my body.

7. You'll mix them up and compare them.

Tenny and Chap are unquestionably fraternal twins. They are both made from different Anderson molds but I still get them mixed up all of the time. I also try not to compare them to one another, but I always do. I will admit that there are some days that Tenny is my favorite and other days that Chap is (usually it is whoever makes it the longest at night). They are two totally different babies with different temperaments, and I love that. I always wished that I could compare my kids as babies next to each other because I forget what they were like. It has been fun to see them change side by side. 

6.  Some advice holds true.

I've had lots of baby advice since I started having kids, but the best piece of advice I got from other twin moms was to keep them on the same schedule. When one baby wakes up, I wake the other one up. I feed them, dress them, and change their diapers at the same time. This has been a game changer. By keeping them on the same schedule I feel like I am feeding one baby (with my incredible nursing pillow) and then only burping, diapering, and dressing two. Feedings take about 30-40 minutes with diaper changes and then we are good to go for another 2.5 hours until the next one. I think this is the reason I have been able to keep my sanity. It's usually Chapman who initiates the feedings, but Tennyson has never objected to being woken up to eat. Thank heavens there is usually only one crying for attention at a time.

5. You'll love your spouse more than ever.

With my other kids, Shad didn't get up to help with nighttime feedings at all. I was nursing them and could handle feeding them on my own so there wasn't any point in having him be tired the next day too. I did feel some resentment that he could get a full nights sleep and I had to get up night after night, but I don't know what he could have done to help.
However, with twins having his help at night has been vital. I did a few nights on my own with him out of town and it took me an extra 20 minutes to burp and change diapers at 3am. I realized the next day how much I appreciated those extra 20 minutes of sleep. We developed a great system in the first month. We had a baby on either side of the bed in a pack in play so we could tell which one was crying. He handed me my nursing pillow and the babies (when I couldn't move from the C-section), I nursed them, handed over the faster feeder, he burped and changed, and then I handed him the other to change while I topped the first one off and he would put them both back down when I was done. Right now they are only waking up once to feed at 3am but even as brand new babies they only did two nightime feedings at the most.
I have treasured those 3am feedings with my husband. We have had some great conversations, funny experiences (especially with Alexa chiming in randomly), and endure the tiredness together the next day. I didn't realize that twins would strengthen my marriage as much as it has. I really do love this man.

4. You won't care about sharing twin germs.

I wondered how it would work with two babies. How would I keep one from getting sick when the other one is sick? They are constantly sharing wet burp cloths, blankets, binkies and feedings on mom. Turns out there really is no way to avoid it, unless you are super anal about it, and who has time for that with 7 kids? Chapman got a cold first at a week old and then Tennyson got it a few days later followed by Chapman getting sick again for a few days. They both had a cough and goopy eyes. I suspect this will be the norm for them growing up, especially with five other kids in the house. I gave up one week into it trying to keep designated bottles, binkies, and blankets. Usually, it's whatever I can grab right in front of me fast.

3. Getting out of the house will make you feel human.

I think I realized this with all of my other babies, but I was reminded more than ever with these boys that taking a shower, putting on makeup, and getting out of the house makes me feel human again and keep me from getting depressed. It's easy to get stir crazy during winter and I think it's even worse when you are at home feeding babies all day. I took every opportunity to get out of the house, even if it was just to go grocery shopping or pick up books from the library. I was really grateful to have my sister in law and my mom here for the first three weeks so I could get out without the babies. We even went to a movie when the babies were a week old thanks to my sister in law. It made me feel like I wasn't attached to those babies and had at least some freedom.

2. You will never regret accepting help. 

After I had the twins I decided that I was going to accept ANY and ALL help that people offered. I figured that they wouldn't offer it if they didn't want to do it. This decision was probably the reason I survived the first month.

We are so blessed where we live to have such great friends and church family that would do anything for us. In the first month, I think I made a total of 10 meals. People would randomly drop by and bring meals, gifts, groceries, and diapers. I had a large box of newborn diapers, but after the first week, I was completely out. A friend asked if she could pick anything up and I told her diapers and few produce items. She came with two bags of groceries and two big boxes of diapers and wouldn't accept a dime. We really were so blessed and I felt like the more help I accepted, the more willing people were to give it. If I would have constantly said "no" I wouldn't have given then the opportunity to serve and I wouldn't have reaped the benefit of their service.

Having my sister in law and my mom here was also invaluable. I feel like I really thrived the first month because they were here helping. I didn't do any dishes or laundry while they were here and could focus fully on the babies. I also felt comforted that my other kids weren't being neglected and were taken care of.

I also had no idea how much I was going to rely on my older kids to help. Haken and Jack have been my lifelines when the babies just want to be held and my other kids require my attention.

1. You'll understand hard joy.

I had a friend with twins describe having twins as "Hard Joy." I now know what she meant. It has been hard, so hard, but these little boys have also brought so much joy. In the first month the "joy" has outweighed the "hard" and made all of the sleepless nights worth it. I'm sure it's going to get harder but I also know that the joy will get even better too. I had no idea that I could love two babies at the same time so completely and equally, but it is totally possible. I feel stretched thin, but my heart is also so full. I never feel caught up and there are a lot of things I am neglecting right now. However, I know how quickly babies grow up and I just want to sit and hold them while they are tiny and still making those squeaky baby noises. It just does not last very long.

My mom gave me a saying for my wall that completely describes what I feel. It says "If you think my hands are full, you should see my heart." I see it every time I walk down my stairs and I am reminded of how full my heart really is.