Tender Mercies

My Dad has cancer. Last night we found out that it is terminal.
It is treatable, but not curable. 

One of my very favorite General Conference talks of all time is
Elder Bednar's talk entitled "The Tender Mercies of the Lord". 

"We should not underestimate or overlook the power of the Lord's tender mercies. The simpleness, the sweetness, and constancy of the tender mercies of the Lord will do much to fortify and protect us in the troubled times in which we do now and will yet live. When words cannot provide the solace we need or express the joy we feel, when it is simply futile to attempt to explain that which is unexplainable, when logic and reason cannot yield adequate understanding about the injustices and inequalities of life, when mortal experience and evaluation are insufficient to produce a desired outcome, and when it seems that perhaps we are so totally alone, truly we are blessed by the tender mercies of the Lord and made mighty, even unto the power of deliverance."

I can not "attempt to explain that which is unexplainable" and I am struggling to understand the "injustices and inequalities of life," but I can tell you about the tender mercies that have blessed my life in the last three weeks. They truly have helped to make me "mighty" and have brought to me the "power of deliverance."
(1 Nephi 1:20)

1) There is never a good "time" to be diagnosed with cancer. Cancer is not convenient. However, knowing my parents history, you would know that the timing of this diagnosis couldn't have been much better. About three years ago he was out of a job for some time. It was a very hard time for us as a family but we got through it and he now has a great job with great insurance. For that we are grateful. He is young, 57 on Christmas Eve, however he is strong and will fight this as long as he can. We are so blessed to have medical technology that gives us the best fighting chance and time to spend with our loved ones. My Dad's Grandma also had a brain tumor around this age. She died when when my dad was 5 years old, on the operating table. We have come so far in the last 50 years. My dad had a brain tumor removed last week and although he has to learn to write again, he is still alive. That to me is amazing. 

2) Last Christmas my parents surprised us with a family trip to Disneyland. It was a much anticipated trip. We didn't get to go until the middle of October, one month ago. It was a dream vacation. My mom got a little teary as we all walked into the gates of Disneyland as a family. We used to go every few years with my family and there are lots of memories shared there. But, I will never forget this last Disneyland vacation. We had no idea that just two weeks after we got home my dad would be going in to remove a brain tumor. It all came on so fast after we got home. The Lord saw it fit to let us have a worry free vacation as a family. The Lord was waiting for us to have that magical time together.

3) Over a year ago my dad was feeling a real push to move out of the house that he had built with his own hands and raised all of his kids in. They had been in that house for 28 years and my mom was a pretty hard cookie to crack when it came to this subject. She loved that house. There were so many memories in that house, and yet, she knew that the upkeep of it in the long run wasn't going to work. So, finally, after about a year of pushing my mom finally conceded and made the leap to a new house in Centerville last July. I myself was sad to see the other house go, it was the only house that I had known growing up (they moved in when I was only a few weeks old), but the house they have now is PERFECT for them. Now seeing what the future holds, I am convinced that the spirit was speaking to my dad telling him to move.

The ward that they are in is amazing. They truly take care of one another. One of the connections that was made that I also see as a tender mercy is a relationship that was rekindled with my dad and Elder Baxter who lives in their new ward. My dad served a mission in Scotland and Elder Baxter was his Assistant to the mission president while he was there. About a year ago Elder Baxter also went in for surgery to remove a brain tumor. His experience has brought strength to my dad during his struggle the last few weeks. The night before the surgery Elder Baxter gave my dad an amazing blessing. I am truly grateful for the power of the priesthood in the last few weeks. 

4) The last tender mercy, although I know there are probably hundreds more that will become apparent, is one that I wouldn't have even suspected. A year ago we started our whole fiasco of moving (a long story for another post soon to come). Somehow in all of that moving we ended up living with my parents for 2 months this last summer. During this time my children developed a love for their grandparents that I don't think we could replicate any other way. Jack became grandpa's "little buddy." Every day when he came home from work Jack would yell "Grandpa!" and jump into his arms. My dad told me that that was the highlight of his day. I'm sure it wasn't easy to share a house with us, but there was never a question of them saying "no," even though we made their move to the new house much harder than it needed to be. I hope that my children will always remember those special two months that they got to spend with their grandpa.

I repeat Elder Bednar's words as he said:

"I testify that the tender mercies of the Lord are real and that they do not occur randomly or merely by coincidence. Often, the Lord's timing of His tender mercies helps us to both discern and acknowledge him."

I absolutely know this to be true. The Lord is truly mindful of us.